"Soy Chi Latte for Jackie"
Jackie seems to be about four months pregnant and she grabs her drink and wobbles to a table with another woman who is having a conversation with someone on her cell phone. The conversation goes as follows:Other woman-"Okay I am going to call you back Jeff, Jackie and I are at Starbucks and I don't want to be rude."
Jackie-"It's ok Lisa, finish your conversation."
(Lisa gets off the phone)
Lisa-"It's always so hard to get off of the phone with him, anyway how are you doing girl?"
Jackie-"I'm ok I guess, I'm still thinking about whether or not I should go ahead and have this baby."
Lisa-"Yeah, that's a difficult decision and I know that you may feel that if you don't have the baby you're being selfish."
Jackie-"I just don't want to bring a baby in this world that's going to have to live with the disease of Down Syndrome for the rest of its life. I really don't think of it as being selfish but as sparing my child the humiliation."
Lisa-"Are you sure that you are trying to spare the child the humiliation or yourself?"
Jackie-"I don't know but when a woman becomes pregnant if anything goes wrong you begin to feel that it is something you did wrong. I really need to make a decision because I don't have that long."
This is a situation that many people would judge from the outside not knowing what it would be like to raise a child with down syndrome. Most woman dream of having the "perfect" child and when that doesn't happen it's like their whole world comes tumbling down. When a person has a child with special needs they know that their life will never be the same. Many special needs children never grow up to have families on their own and this pains a parent to even think about. Someone told me once that just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you'll have a baby and just because you have a baby doesn't mean that they won't have anything wrong with them. Bringing a child into the world is a blessing but it can also bring on many heart-wrenching worries.
Jackie-"It's ok Lisa, finish your conversation."
(Lisa gets off the phone)
Lisa-"It's always so hard to get off of the phone with him, anyway how are you doing girl?"
Jackie-"I'm ok I guess, I'm still thinking about whether or not I should go ahead and have this baby."
Lisa-"Yeah, that's a difficult decision and I know that you may feel that if you don't have the baby you're being selfish."
Jackie-"I just don't want to bring a baby in this world that's going to have to live with the disease of Down Syndrome for the rest of its life. I really don't think of it as being selfish but as sparing my child the humiliation."
Lisa-"Are you sure that you are trying to spare the child the humiliation or yourself?"
Jackie-"I don't know but when a woman becomes pregnant if anything goes wrong you begin to feel that it is something you did wrong. I really need to make a decision because I don't have that long."
This is a situation that many people would judge from the outside not knowing what it would be like to raise a child with down syndrome. Most woman dream of having the "perfect" child and when that doesn't happen it's like their whole world comes tumbling down. When a person has a child with special needs they know that their life will never be the same. Many special needs children never grow up to have families on their own and this pains a parent to even think about. Someone told me once that just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you'll have a baby and just because you have a baby doesn't mean that they won't have anything wrong with them. Bringing a child into the world is a blessing but it can also bring on many heart-wrenching worries.
1 comment:
I think about this all the time. I'm thankful for a healthy child. And when I'm asked if I want anymore, I usually answer "no." One of the reason is because of the huge responsible of having a child, and if the child has special needs that makes it even harder. Thanks for sharing this story.
~Tiesha
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